Intercultural Life
Relationships with Koreans- friendships and romance
It was my birthday yesterday! One of my presents was a new straightener/styler but because it’s monsoon season I can’t really do much at the moment. The humidity is so bad in Korea at the moment and my poor white girl hair can’t handle it. It frizzes immediately. So instead I used it on Hugh’s hair and gave him wonderful Kpop hair.
I’m used to kilos, so seeing a weight in pounds makes no sense to me and I definitely can’t convert that in my head! (Thank you Google).
In normal conversation we don’t really have trouble understanding each other, but when either of us is muttering there can be some interesting interpretations.
For those that don’t know, we are in Seoul for a month house-sitting (and pet-sitting) for our friends (Eat Your Kimchi) while they do a tour in North America. Which is why Hugh is sitting on a sofa and I was randomly weighing myself, because we don’t have scales (or a sofa) at home.
He likes to think I’m such a baby and so helpless so it’s funny to turn it back on him.
Also it’s not just about being forgetful, it’s because once I’ve got my shoes on, I can’t go back inside! I’m not Korean and haven’t mastered the getting shoes on in 2 seconds thing. It’s such a hassle having to take my shoes off again, go back inside and get whatever I forgot and then put my shoes back on.
In Sydney we had a no shoes inside rule as well, but we’d ignore it if we had to run and get something quickly. I’ll get in big trouble if my inlaws see me do that though.
We live on a farm, in the middle of nowhere… sometimes annoying me is his only entertainment. I often give a good reaction as well. If you watch our vlogs and see him harassing me I’ll do the “Nooo! Don’t!!” and give him a good response to his teasing. I’ve gone through times where I’ve done the blank face and ignored it (because really I don’t mind that much) but it doesn’t matter if I give a reaction or not, he will still do it. He just genuinely likes annoying me, so I might as well make him laugh by reacting to his antics.
However! His sister has just arrived from Australia, where she was for 2 years. She came home yesterday and already they have been bickering, so I think I don’t have to bear the brunt of his antics now.
Don’t judge him too harshly, I definitely have my hyperactive moments of being super annoying and harassing him. He just doesn’t make comics about it.
We get asked a lot about how Hugh’s parents reacted to him bringing home an Australian girlfriend. We also get asked whether Korean parents are likely to accept a foreigner son or daughter in law and what can be done to make things go smoothly. We talk about the stereotype of Korean parents refusing to accept foreigners, hypothetical situations versus reality and some warning signs.
As with any video, there are many things we can’t cover. For example, we didn’t talk about incidences of Korean parents completely refusing to accept a foreigner (of course that can happen but we just don’t know anyone who has had that experience personally). We also didn’t comment on Korean American situations or Koreans who grew up in countries other than Korea. The stigma of single mothers is another serious topic and how that will affect acceptance from Korean parents is another topic that we weren’t able to cover this time.
There are a few reasons why we are living with Hugh’s parents. One reason is that they are getting older and Hugh probably won’t ever have this type of time with them again, so making the most of it. Another reason is that it is of course cheaper for us to live with them. Hugh could go get a job and work hard and we could have a nice apartment and car, but he wouldn’t be able to do any blogging or edit videos or have much time for me. So we are making those sacrifices so we can get the website and business ideas off the ground, as well as cherishing our time together. We would pretty much have to stop YouTube if he was to get a normal Korean job.
Mostly it’s fine living with his parents. They let us do our own thing, but of course it is hard to have privacy. Not only that, but his parents are an older generation and in the countryside. They never show any affection for each other in front of others, so Hugh can be self conscious about even a quick peck if his parents are around – which is most of the time!
While movies often glamorize international relationships, in reality there are a lot of things to think about!
Also just wanted to clarify that when we say “the government doesn’t care if you are married” we meant that the government doesn’t give a crap about your love life and a marriage certificate is not a visa, nor does it guarantee a visa. However, actually being married can make obtaining a visa easier. We will expand on these topics in later videos.
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